It's no big secret (or maybe it is, but it's not a secret from me due to the fact that it's pretty hard for me to keep secrets for myself) that I struggle with confidence issues.
I fluctuate wildly day to day moment to moment between thinking I am the cutest cutie face ever to not even wanting to acknowledge or deal with my face that's always breaking out and splotchy, with my lifeless hair, with my belly fat and love handles, with my clothes that just never. fit. right.
Can you tell where I am on the confidence scale currently?
But, listen. I'm not a total headcase. I know that I have all the elements of a beautiful lady. I just need to learn and be willing to invest time into making my look come together so that I can feel sure that I'm looking my best. Because those days when I'm wearing ill-fitting clothes and I've thrown my hair up in a messy bun and my makeup consists of chapstick, I just don't feel good.
Some people do and that's awesome. Yay, you guys! I fully support that. For me personally, though, I need to put some effort into myself to feel outstanding.
Which is where Operation: Cutie Pie comes into play.
I took the day off work yesterday. I didn't request it off with the intention of O:CP in mind, but when I started visualizing my day off, I decided that I did want to start the journey into feeling better about the way I present myself to the world. It's crossed my mind a lot recently that it would be fun to start playing around with different hairstyles and makeup, since I pretty much do the same thing every day right now and with the help of Pinterest and tutorials from thebeautydepartment.com, there aren't any excuses. I could very seriously try a different hairstyle and makeup style every day for the next year and not repeat. Which is totally cray and I have no intention of doing, but I could if I wanted to. So, maybe two days a week, I'll play around with it.
Since I had nowhere to go yesterday, except Sprouts, I went with a sixties updo and what started out as a cateye, but turned into SmokeyTown, USA instead.
I posted the result of my playtime to Instagram yesterday.(Can't figure out how to get Instagram pics in a post! Help?)
Annnnnnyhow. To the point. My main source of upset is clothes that don't look good and/or that I don't feel good in.
My brilliant idea? Fix my wardrobe up!
1. Pull all my clothes out of their various hiding places.
2. Remove any clothes that no longer fit or I no longer wear.
3. Remove any tops that don't match at least two bottoms.
That's just the beginning, of course, but I feel like I'm on track to getting the clothes situation under control.
Here's part one of the clothing portion of O:CP.
These are the clothes that don't get to stick around, plus a sudoku book for kicks. The top picture is the before and the bottom picture is everything packaged up for the nearest thrift store or church rummage sale.
Some examples of what is being sent away. The world's shortest skirt that I wore to Eric's 80s birthday party, but never will again because my butt hangs out and that's inappropriate. Ex-boyfriend penguin boxers. The nightgown I bought in high school to wear once I got pregnant. (Hi, Roxy!) A prairie skirt?
Activity specific clothes, which are my workout and camping clothes. These are the clothes I should not be seen in unless I am doing physical activity or I am out in the woods. The workout clothes go into what is still referred to as my "gym bag", although I haven't had a gym membership in over a year. I'm not sure where to store the camping clothes. Suggestions?
Clothes for altering, hemming, otherwise fixing.
Organization is exhausting. Roxy will tell you all about it, if you have the time.
There ya go. That was my day off. I also made shutterbean's Curried Chicken with Coconut Rice and even after reading her fair warning, I have stained my cuticles with curry and they, no matter how much I wash my hands, smell of onion and curry. Yums.
Curry cuticles. One more step toward confidence. It's the hot new thing.